Hormonal Imbalance

Remember I said that this postgrad life is a struggle? Well, one of the struggle I have to face is lots of pimple!

I think that I am quite lucky that I don't really have puberty pimples. So, since high school up until now, I can count my experience dealing with real pimples. Normally, there will be few tiny bumps that pop out for about 2-3 days and will disappear without I noticed (and I rarely give extra attention). The real pimple will come out basically during raya or any crucial events. Have you been in the same situation as me too?

So, when I started doing research back in Oct, everything seems well. At the early stage I can marathon 1 season of Grey's Anatomy for only 1-2 days so you can imagine how relaxed I am. Compared to my other coursework and mix mode's friend, I am the most relax person at that time. Go to school at 8, having lunch on time, googling papers, and packed my things at 5 sharp.

Tapi start Januari tu.. ada je anasir-anasir yang muncul kat muka. Kulit mengelupas la. Jerawat jelas yang amik masa lama nak hilang la. Januari tu aku rasa tu jerawat stress untuk wedding preparation wawa. Pastu pakai mekap. Bulan depannya tu pun sama. Mekap.

Mac tu ada duit lebih sikit so nak try invest on skincare. Before this dah ada rose gold water and moisturizer. Cleanser, toner, and sunscreen dah habis so nak try band baru. Pastu beli foundation sebab nak pergi function. Kemain aku beli. At last, Revlon tu pakai boleh kira dengan jari berapa kali aku pakai. Sunscreen Biore warna kuning oren tu buat muka aku jadi gatal. Toner Safi warna hijau tu ada alkohol lebih buat kulit aku mengelupas. Cleanser Aiken tu alhamdulillah ok tapi still, macam tak berapa nak membantu sangat kalau nak compare dengan Ponds.

Cheapskate skincare set

Nak discover mana 1 produk yang tak kena dengan muka bukan sekejap. Ada sekali tu, aku rasa geram sangat dengan bumps sebab kerap sangat muncul so aku reset semua skincare steps 2 minggu lepas. Muka pun cuci pakai air paip je. Tekad dah ni. Pergi school, pergi kerja barefaced. Pastu baru try pakai satu-satu. Pakai ni, rasa gatal. Pakai ni, kulit rasa pedih. So tahu la produk mana yang tak kena tu. Sedih weh. Rasa bazir gila masa & duit. Dahlah sebelum beli tu pun dok baca review, ingredients, beauty blog & videos, etc. Sekali tak sesuai dengan muka.

Even 2 hari lepas, muncul jerawat satu antara hidung dengan upper lips. Selalunya aku punya pimples period akan keluar lepas menses, so bengang jugak la bila benda tu muncul tiba-tiba. Nasib ada tempat mengadu walaupun dia respon love seketul untuk mesej panjang berjela aku tu 😆 Ibu pulak dengar je time aku membebel during video call 😂 Elok yang tu reda, eh berganti pulak betul-betul bawah hidung. Aku syak ni jerawat stress ni.

Sekarang tengah kejar nak siapkan banyak benda. Research, questionnaire, proposal, conference, kerja part-time lagi. Tiket balik raya tak boleh nak beli lagi ni, selagi tak confirm bila boleh start cuti. Pening. Pening.

So, tu je la. Selamat berpuasa semua! Semoga aku kurang membebel dan improve manners sempena nak masuk ramadhan ke 9 ni.

Mode of Study: Coursework or Research

Ada masa sikit ni so nak cerita pasal comparison between coursework and research. I've shared a lil bit of my experience of my pre-postgrad experience. Basically, akan jadi camni..

Sebelum decide nak sambung mode mana 1, fikir dulu;

1. Apa yang awak nak sebenarnya? 
2. Apa plan awak dalam 1 tahun, 2 tahun and 5 tahun akan datang? 
3. Kenapa nak sambung belajar? 
4. Lepas tu, buat SWOT analysis untuk diri sendiri. 

Another explanation dah ada dekat my first post, tak silap. kalau i pandai, i attach link haha!

Okay, so here is the next episode.

Why coursework?

1. sebab nak cepat grad
2. sebab ada classmates
3. sebab boleh handle weekly assignments
4. sebab nak masuk industri
5. sebab nak naik tangga gaji
6. sebab confirm ada cuti sem

Selalunya, if you decided to enter industry, you are preferred to do coursework. Sebab boleh buat part-time jugak. Kiranya, kerja jadi nombor 1, postgrad is your 2nd priority. Ataupun sebab memang tak suka buat research writing. 

Dalam coursework jugak, kena belajar semua method, nanti kat hujung sem baru pilih method mana nak apply dalam dissert. So, plus point nak masuk industri bila buat coursework sebab dah tahu banyak method.

Why research? some of my reasons (ok, this is my first post.) 

In short, student kena belajar sendiri apa yang related dengan research field. Method, problem, data, sampling, etc. You do what you want. Of course dengan guidance from supervisor la. Macam pre PhD. Cuma your contribution is smaller than PhD. 

Ada jugak yang seek guidance dengan pergi workshop, seminar. Join conference or symposium sebab kena publish paper. It depends on uni's requirement jugak kena publish berapa journal, hantar kat publication mana semua (I'll make a post about conference, insya Allah).

And bila buat research mode, plus point untuk publication. Sebab nanti nak masuk edu line, uni will consider your publication experiences. Ada jugak student who looks forward to best thesis award. 

Or else, you may opt to mix mode. Belajar dulu, nanti last sem buat dissert.

Mana lagi senang?

Duduk rumah baring depan tv la paling senang. pun intended. 

I will never say coursework is much easier than research or vice versa. Sebab semua mode ada struggle masing-masing. 

You've known yourself better than others. Ada orang dia jenis laju gila absorb bila masuk kelas, jawab test, etc. Ada orang dia pesen kreatif, suka invent benda baru, hybrid benda-benda sedia ada. 

Don't block your mind and/or choosing the most easiest way out. Ni pasal masa depan ni. Fikir elok-elok. 

I've started thinking of postgrad prospect during my degree life - sem 6. During internship pun fikir lagi. Nak tekan submit button dalam online application pun takut. Dah dapat offer letter, lagi lah. Boleh pulak ada rasa nak defer. Sebab we never know what's in the future. Ordeal apa yang akan muncul. Financial issue, family, friends, love, also career. It's a difficult phase because this is the start of our adulthood. 

In all, always remember that postgrad life ni bukan ukur tahap cerdik kita, tapi ukur tahap struggle and how we survive. Appreciate the process. 

Choose wisely!